I used to be a serial dater...

but now things have changed

Your thoughts (72) I used to be a serial dater...

When I was younger I always used to jump from one relationship to the next. I went through so much, but in the end, I learnt a lot about taking care of and getting to know, yourself first.

The first person I dated was my boyfriend. We dated for many years and we were happy. Things were so perfect and no one could tear us apart.

Then suddenly, his friends began to not trust me because I had other guy friends. He started to believe them about me not being trustworthy. He started to have trust issues and that’s when our relationship started suffering.

We used to fight each and every week and it started to affect my school work. He would get angry about the smallest things, like me not having enough money to buy him a birthday gift or me spending time with my guy friends. When he dumped me I moved on very quickly because I didn’t want to feel lonely. The guy I dated after that also had a lot of insecurities and he was often very abusive towards me.

After that, I didn’t date but I had many flings. When I started being in a serious relationship again I was with a guy who promised me many dreams. He even told me he would marry me and buy me a house. I was committed to him, but he ended up cheating on me with my friend.

After not dating for a while, I realised that I have not given myself much time to know myself and grow as a person. After a year of not dating, I’ve learnt how good I am at writing and maths and I even became top of the class in my grade. When you start focusing on yourself, you see that you have so much power and you learn to love yourself. You don’t have to be in a relationship to be happy and secure.

I want girls to know that no matter how hurt you are and how lonely you may be, you don't have to date to fill that empty space. Wait for the right person to come your way, and focus on yourself and your well-being. Tips on how you can work on yourself from your big sisters at Springster:

  1. Dating doesn’t have to be your number one priority. Take time to know yourself by spending more time with yourself. Try to find activities you enjoy doing on your own, like writing, meditating, watching movies or exercising.

  2. Make time for your family and friends. When you have time, try to bond and talk to your friends and your relatives. They can be the best source of support when you need it!

  3. Focus on school and think about things that will help you in your career and your future. Giving time to your studies gives you a chance to think about what your passions are.

Do you have a similar story? Let us know in the comment section below!

  • #relationships
  • #confidence
  • #love

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