I'm a lesbian

Here is Busi’s story about how she realised she was lesbian

Your thoughts (153)

When I was younger, I had a hard time connecting with the couples that I saw on TV.

At first, I tried very hard to avoid the attraction that I felt for women. When I was with my female friends I spoke about boys a lot. Because I never wanted them to ever question my sexuality. I tried very hard to fit in, act straight and avoid everything I felt.

When I turned 18 years old, I was still living in denial. Lying to myself was getting harder and harder to do. I was at that age when everyone around me was dating. So I dated boys even though I was never interested and the relationships never lasted long.

My last boyfriend, Babalo, broke up with me two days before my 19th birthday. I remember feeling so relieved! I didn’t have to pretend anymore. I was so relieved, I started to cry. I was finally ready to admit who I was to myself. “I’m a lesbian.” It was the first time I’d said those words out loud.

Admitting who I was to myself was the first step to living my truth. I spent my days reading blogs and watching YouTube videos dedicated to lesbian women. Now that I had accepted who I was, I wanted to know about my people - where were they, who are they and what were their lives like? There were community and organizations such as OUT and GALA and a history that I was a part of and I wanted to embrace it.

This excitement was something that I carried with me on the inside. Because I still didn’t know how to tell my parents that I was a lesbian.

After much planning and rehearsing of my speech, I sat my parents down and came out to them. There was a pause. My mom reached over, squeezed my hand and said, “Thank you for finally telling us. Thank you for trusting us.” Apparently, they’d known all along and were just waiting for me to feel comfortable enough to tell them.

I know everyone’s experience is different and not everyone has accepting family and friends. I’m fortunate that I do.

Here are a few tips from Busisiwe about coming out:

Coming out is not always a safe option for everyone who is part of the LGBTI community. If you believe that coming out will endanger your safety or leave you homeless then you may need to consider your options.

If you are struggling with your sexuality and need someone to speak to reach out to Childline at 0800 55 555

Reach out to LGBTI organizations in your community, or even online if you are scared to be seen, as long as you feel safe to do so. Speaking to someone who understands your struggles is always good. They will help make sense of the confusion and will offer valuable advice.

Coming out is a personal experience so before you decide to come out to your family make sure you feel comfortable and confident.

Be prepared for the fact that your family may not take the news the way you’d like them to. Think of coming out to your family as a process and not just one moment. It will take time for your family to get used to the news.

NOTE: The girl featured in this photograph is a model and has no relation to the content of the article.

Share your feedback

Your thoughts

Bela329

Hey guys. Am new here

Sept. 27, 2022, 12:45 p.m.

Latest Reply
Amierh

Hi bbes u welcome ❤❤

Bela329

Thanks loviey

mbatha

Hi welcome ♥️🔥

Bela329

Thank u Amahle💙🙏

mbatha

Amahle how did you know my real name 🥰😕

Bela329

I read all your comments.

MasterOfPuppets

mbatha you should be glad you have your own stalker (I'm jealous)

Zoey

Hi 👋 I am really confused 😌 about my sexuality last year I knew that I was a straight girl until a lesbian in my class came to me and told me that she really loved ❤️ me and she wants to date with me ❤️ I told her that I am interested in boys only, but after a week I started gaining feelings for her and that confused 🤔 me and it still confuses me now. I don't know if I am bisexual or into boys or girls

Sept. 24, 2022, 4:39 p.m.

Latest Reply
mbatha

Girl plz follow your heart if your heart is confusing you tell her that you have feelings for her but if you are not sure just tell her but say you are not ready YET to build a relationship coz you is she a nice person or a not nice if she is nice she will understand if not she will do the opposite you can take my advice if you want to but it will cost you just joking 🤣🥰💌💞💓💘

Zoey

Hi mbatha thanks for your advise I will see what she says and again thanks ❤️🙏

mbatha

It's my pleasure and it's what I do you welcome ♥️

Kennedy

I like Mbatha....she seems pretty upright but not in a sexual way thou🙂.

Sept. 24, 2022, 11:34 a.m.

Latest Reply
mbatha

Thanks , you can call me Amahle do you know that if you have a good heart and a good brain you can make every impossible possible and I live in a poor community but I live in a stable family and my family is strict so I really appreciate them that's why I have a calm soul but thanks I don't really talk alot but thanks

momodacutiegurl1

Hi I am available need a lesbian to date with

Sept. 21, 2022, 9:36 a.m.

Latest Reply
mbatha

Okay good for you 😘🥰💌

Elaine10

Being lesbian is nice ,u won't get pregnant

Sept. 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Latest Reply
mbatha

Hi I am also new , to me being a Lesbian isn't about not getting pregnant it's about the way YOU feel about YOURSELF 👀🥺💞💘🫂🫂

_Datgal125

Don't forgot that a lesbian is a girl..she have a vagina so it's possible for a lesbian to be pregnant..so i don't know what are you saying

mbatha

She or He is right you can still get pregnant because you have a vagina 🤔🤨🤨

Neko-chan

But you ain't dating boys so chances of pregnancy are very limited

mbatha

Yh you are right Neko Chan but she said she is a Lesbian unless ..... she's not 🤨😔😕

mbatha

Wow I am a les too oh hi I'm new please welcome me 💓💘💌

Sept. 17, 2022, 8:43 p.m.

Latest Reply
Amierh

Hi darling u welcome❤❤

Sannie

Hy you are welcome💖💖

mbatha

Thanks guys please can you guys be my friend's since I became a Lesbian everyone is running away from me😭😭🥺💔💔

Amierh

Ok give me ur tenz so that we can talk❤❤

mbatha

I am not sure about that I mean I don't even know ur name 😕😕

Amierh

My name is Amierh from Chatsworth i'm a gal

mbatha

Nice too meet you I am Amahle from Johannesburg in the Gauteng province how old are you I am 15

Amierh

I'm 15 yrs old

mbatha

Wow same age tell me about your self I am a Learner I am a Lesbian and I have a very calm soul I like people like me too but it is not easy for me to make friends to coz I am a Lesbian so that is the story of my life 💔💌🥺🫂

Oyza

I am bi

Sept. 14, 2022, 5:14 p.m.

Latest Reply
Danger

I am very horny and I need someone to sex chat with 0724286491

mbatha

Wow just wow Danger I mean really 🤨🤨

MasterOfPuppets

Danger you're one very sad individual

mbatha

I think I am going to like you 'Master of puppets'🤣🤣🤣

Fikza

Hi..well am a girl I've been in a relationship with this girl and im so fucken in love with her💍🌍butt every time we get into arguments she just post's"tell your beautiful sister about me cos ngizomphatha nje nge ndlovukazi"or just post "single lyf" So guys i want to ask Do you think she loves me too💔🕳

Sept. 4, 2022, 6:59 p.m.

Latest Reply
Oyza

She doesn't love you

Kelebogile

Hi I'm Kelebogile and I'm lesbian and now I'm dating a girl(lestud)and I'm (Lesfemme I'm a proud Lesbian and I love being a lesbian🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈❤️❤️Just be ur self 🏳️‍🌈

Sept. 2, 2022, 5:23 p.m.

Latest Reply
Silondiwe_877

Hi guys im and a new springster can i be friends with you?🥺

Jessica

I want a lesbian 2 date too🙈🥺🖤✌️

Aug. 20, 2022, 9:36 a.m.

Latest Reply
ntswalo_28

me 2

Oyza

Me3

momodacutiegurl1

Hi

Owethu13

I also need a lesbian that i can date💋💋💓💓😘😘😘

Aug. 15, 2022, 5:44 p.m.

Latest Reply
Oyie

Same

Oyie

Except mna I want a boy

ntswalo_28

number phone🙏🙏

Juliet

It's even harder when you in the closet and not sseing your self coming out🥺🥺🥺😔😔

Aug. 13, 2022, 9:25 a.m.

Klye

I am dating 2girls but rere doesn't have time for me. Amahle does have time for me and spend time like talk,hugs and kisses. I love amahle 💜💙🖤💓💞💝💕💘❣️💗❤️💚♥️💛

Aug. 10, 2022, 6 p.m.

Latest Reply
Amierh

Hi

Kyle

Hey

Amierh

How are you

Kyle

Fine

Amierh

Ohk

Kyle

Can you be my girlfriend

Amierh

Yes bbe❤❤

Kyle

Thanks

Kyle

Please send me your number on moya

Amierh

Ok but we already talk

Kyle

On lovely friends

Amierh

Yes of course

Oyza

🤭🤭🤭Just like that

Klye

I am proud of my lesbainity❤️💙🖤💓💞💕❣️💗♥️💜💚💛♥️

Aug. 9, 2022, 11:31 a.m.

Latest Reply
Nomthawelanga

Can we date

@Nosie

🏳️‍🌈♥️

Kyle

Ofcurse

Nomthawelanga

I need a les who will love me

Aug. 7, 2022, 5:43 a.m.

Latest Reply
Klye

We can date

Nomthawelanga

Okay your 😍💗your numbers plZ

Klye

0726379129

Nomthawelanga

Thanks 😊 🫂

Klye

Pleasure

Nomthawelanga

Who needs a girl friend

Aug. 6, 2022, 7:30 p.m.

Latest Reply
Kyle

Me

Kabelo

I am a lesbian and I am very very insecure. What should I do?

July 21, 2022, 3:36 p.m.

Yolanda

I can relate to Busisiwe's story I'm also lesbian few years back I was dating boys but I had this weird feeling for girls in Grd 5 but I d

July 21, 2022, 1:50 p.m.

Latest Reply
Amierh

Hey bbs😊

Thobeka_2

I'm attracted to both girls and boys but I feel more for girls 😭💓💯but I don't feel comfortable because my body shape doesn't fit being a lesbian. I've got a girly body too much 😭

July 17, 2022, 9:07 p.m.

Latest Reply
Mihle_

Can we date

MasterOfPuppets

Being a lesbian has nothing to do with your body, it has do with liking people of the same sex

@mahle

I am a lesbian and I am not ashamed 💍😞

July 14, 2022, 6:07 p.m.

Latest Reply
Amierh

Can we date

Alyvia

Hey Springsters I'm new here and I'm 16 years old I'm not sure what I am what does pansexual mean by the way

July 11, 2022, 8:28 p.m.

Latest Reply
Cherry28

Hi am also pansexual and it means you are attracted to all sexualities but physically not emotionally.

Oyza

Wow thanx Cherry I had no idea

Nonjabulo

I realize that I like both genders am bisexual but no one know this

July 11, 2022, 6:15 a.m.

Latest Reply
Zoe

I am too

Nonjabulo

Ur number

Love

No need to be ashamed I AM ALSO LESBIAN AND I Am PROUD😊😊

June 27, 2022, 11:42 p.m.

Latest Reply
Love

I am horny I need to have sex with a lesbian👉👌 please!!😭😭

Maynardville_love4eva

Same

Maynardville_love4eva

I need someone who i can sex chat with 0670284322

Klye

I need a lesbian who will kiss me

Nomthawelanga

Kyle I am right here babe

Nomthawelanga

I mean klye

Mihle_

@maynardville_love4eva im here boo

Klye

Okay

Anerlerh

Min angnandab ukt bacangn njengb ngylesbain😇 ngzthand nginje❤️❤️

June 23, 2022, 6:59 p.m.

Latest Reply
Oyie

Yes girl

Well done for taking control of your love life What does "LGBTI" mean?

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

Latest Reply

L-lesbian G-gay B-bisexual T-transsexual I-....i forgot what it stands for

Hi Springster, thank you for your comment. LBGTI stands for Lesbian, Bisexual, Gay, Trans and Intersex.

Jinx

Lesbian Gay Bisexual sorry but I don't know the rest T I

Congrats girl I'm o glad uu spoke out ☺

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

Latest Reply

Yeah girl at least she spoke out

Congrats girl I'm o glad uu spoke out ☺

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

I think it's healthy to live the truth because it won't be nice when your partner finds out from the rumours....

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

I feel like I relate to Busi's story. I've also been dating guys though I'm sexually attracted to girls. What confuses me is that I am not just attracted to girls but lesbians but I don't wanna be one. I once dating a girl and my family didn't like the idea if me dating someone of the same sex and forced us to stop. I would carry on dating lesbians but I'm scared, scared of what people in my community and my family will say😞

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hi there I know it's not always easy, as I'm also lesbian and very much happily married to my partner. At the end of the day you can't live your live for your family or community it's just going to make you an unhappy soul... Take it one day at a time... I truly hope things work out for you...

Hi Springster. Thank you for sharing. It's great that you can see yourself in the article. Springster is a safe space for girls to come share, learn and talks about a lot of different things. You are so brave for sharing. If you are afraid about how your community might react or treat you, you should speak to an adult that you trust when you are ready to start dating again. Sadly, we can't talk to you directly but you can call Childline SA. They will offer you counselling over the phone, in person and online. You don't need to give them your name and can contact them any time of the day or night. Contact them if you need extra support or just need someone to listen to you. They are here to help you! Don't forget you can contact them on their 24/7 Toll-Free Helpline: 08 000 55 555 for help. Check out their website: http://www.childlinesa.org.za.

Be brave enough to face the Truth live your life dear remember you're racing with no one ,so just forget about what people will say 💪

Is it a sin to be a lesbian??

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

Latest Reply

The Bible says that it is .... But you know how people can be..they change the wrongs to be rights and I can never judge a person who is in love with the same sex because I have a family friend who is also in love with a girl even though she's also a girl and I so love and admire their love for each other ... Also if you take a look at love relationships of today the LGBTI relationships are the ones that last longer

In South Africa there are many cultures, as well as religions and belief systems, in the eyes of the law there is not one that is more important than any other. So it's important to understand that the laws and values of our nation protect and serve people from all walks of life and that means regardless of sexuality, gender or race. Discrimination of any kind against anyone for their sexual orientation is against our constitution and those are the values and laws of the land regardless of what religion you belong to. In the eyes of the law of South Africa, the lesbian community holds equal rights and is valued as citizens. They can marry, hold their dream jobs, own property, have children, build families and live a fulfilling life just like all other people. The right to be treated equally and to live in dignity and be protected and valued in society extends to all of the LGBTQ community and it's important that we respect that no matter what religious beliefs we hold.

Been a lesbian is a sin according to the Bible but you know guys we only live once ...and I'm also a lesbian and I'm proud of that so just be open to yourself people and accept who you are ♡♥

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

Latest Reply

Heyy shanaya

Its not a sin..... What gay people?????

What about gay people**?

Love

Yes you right I am just as proud😊☺️

people are allowed to do whatever they want to better themselves and become the version of themselves.. so no one is allowed to judge her from becoming a lesbians..

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster, thanks for your comment. We love your attitude!

You go girl ! Be yourself and never be ashamed to cause you good at it and they can't do ,they hate that they wanna paint you.

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

Never fear anything. Be who you are.....accept ur self the way you are.....

March 20, 2022, 8:58 p.m.

Hey fellow springsters I really don't know what's going on with me. I've once had a thing with this girl and it was so freaking awesome actually way more adventurous than dating a boy although she was seeing someone. I'm not really proud with being busy with someone who was in a relationship.This girl made it feel like I was still with my ever first boyfriend. But yea anyways, I don't think I'm homosexual because I date boys too. But you see I really enjoy dating a girl more than a boy. Now I got involved with this boy... His name is Kevin but I don't really don't like him at all. And he wants me to meet his family. I met this girl through a friend, whom apparently had a crush on me and now I have this major crush on her... And like this is so confusing... I don't know what to do I don't even know my about my own sexuality... PLEASE HELP!!!!!

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

I'm a lesbian but my parents don't know .I'm afraid on how to tell them .Can anyone give me an advice do that I can be free

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

Latest Reply
Love

I was just as scared but I told them and they had to accept me for who I am😀😀

I'm a lesbian but my parents don't know .I'm afraid on how to tell them .Can anyone give me an advice do that I can be free

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Talk to your mother they can be very understanding you know .

Talk to your mother she ll definitely understand you

I think when coming out to parents,You need to first talk to an easy target but telling him or her as a secret but then if he or she can no longer keep it as a secret she will go tell your parents,now because she is an easy target it will be a lot easier for you cause he or she can make things easier because he or she is an easy target.

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

Hey guys am turning 15yrs this year and am dating a lesbian Does that mean am a lesbian ??

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

Hey guys am turning 15yrs this year and am dating a lesbian Does that mean am a lesbian ??

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

Hey guys l have been date guys before but l can't keep my eyes off a woman who look hot or sexy l can never say a guy is hot l always will say a lady is hot not a guy so l meet this guy who like me so we start to date but everytime he kiss me l don't get leke it's like l just what him to stop kiss me it is really not nice cause he a good guy but l just don't get leke if he do it please help what must l do ?

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster, being confused about your sexual identity is not a trains-mash. Humans are complex beings, so it's totally understandable. You should try and find a trusted adult to talk to. If you can't you should consider calling Love Life on 0 8 0 0 1 2 1 9 0 0 or send them a please call me on this number 0 8 3 3 2 3 1 0 2 3 to call you back. They are there to help when it comes to issues like sexual identity. Another organisation with helpful professionals is the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline. They are available from Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 on 0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 3 1 or 0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 3 1.

I would really like to know if am lesbian or not

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster, trying to figure out your sexual identity when you feel unsure or confused can be hard, but it's totally normal. If you feel a bit frustrated or you need to talk to someone, you can call Love Life on 0800 121 900 or send them a please call me on this number 0 8 3 3 2 3 1 0 2 3 to call you back.

Hey guys🙋💞i really need ur help😖am dating this guy🤗💞but I have this thing for galz😍and it's been years now😔so I figured it out that I wanna be a lesbian but some of my friends don't wanna support me😿and am afraid to lose them😖but I told myself that time will come💫💦and I will be who I want to be💫...so my question is can I date galz and boys at the same time? And what should I do to be who I want to be😿cuz am really interested in the lesbian pride/thing💞i really love lesbians💞💫💦so plz help me?!!🙏🙏

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

It's means you are bisexual and also if your friends don't accept that that then that means they are not your friends cause friends support you no matter what and it's okay to like girls and boys cause it's your life ❤️❤️😊

Hey Springster, we're so proud of you for claiming your sexual identity despite what others feel or think. It's so important to be yourself and own. You are sooo inspiring us! Nthabee, you can date whoever you want. if you are attracted to girls, you can also be attracted to boys as well and vice versa. There are no rules when it comes to who you choose to love. You should call the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline to ask to ask more questions and get support. They are available from Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 on 0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 3 1 or 0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 3 1.

Nthabee date whoever you want,do what makes you happy....remember your happiness comes first, never mind what people say...,be you girl.,I'm also a lesbian.

Do you girl,be proud of who you are .finish and Klara.

hey guys i need ur help my menstruation cycle is confusing me i menstruate for a whole month i dont know why please help me

March 20, 2022, 8:57 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hello Sasko Our menstrual cycles are different hence we are also different people.What you are experiencing happens especially when you are on contraceptives.Please go to the clinic or doctor and they will be able to help you out. as they are professionals on health related issues.Thank you Springster

Hey! Guys please help me find myself... I act as a lesbian when am around people but I have feelings for boys and I don't know if am bisexual or something.

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Reabetswetokollo, discovering your sexual orientation is a journey you don't have to rush. If you are attracted to boys that's fine, if you are attracted to girls that's fine and if you are attracted to both then that's fine too. Take your time to find out who are your comfortable being with. No matter which gender you date that's okay because you can decide to be with whoever you want to be with. The choice is yours.

You might be bisexual, nor just a tomboy,there is null wrong bout that.

You might be bisexual nor a tomboy,there is null wrong bout that...it's okay.

My friend is a lesbian and she is very scared to tell her family about her decision

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

She should tell them

Good morning people Im 16 years old ..The thing is whenever I'm kissing a guy I don't get horny ,I don't really feel the kiss but the moment I hug sum of my gurls schoolmates I get horny 😮😯Im really confused .Help me out please

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Try a female,see how it goes....

Love

Metro😅😅

Good morning people Im 16 years old ..The thing is whenever I'm kissing a guy I don't get horny ,I don't really feel the kiss but the moment I hug sum of my gurls schoolmates I get horny 😮😯Im really confused .Help me out please

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

U don't really have to get horny when u hug a guy......

U don't really have to get horny when u hug a guy......

those are the signs tht u are one of us or u belong to be with us

I can relate, I'm also a homosexual..., I'm proud bout that,God loves us all.,To all the homosexual human beings out there be proud of who you are,celebrate it,be Content.. ....Truth is the only safe ground to stand upon.

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

❣ truth to that💞 Just be proud of who you are💚don't care about what people are saying or going to say about u💞💝

I'm lesbian too

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

That good am lesbian and I realized the am not for boy am for girl and now am dating girls am 13 yes

Hii... I was a lesbian n I'll never go bck for it bcz girls of today r full of nonsense....yoh... eish its heavy hyy...!!!

Hi lm also lesbian into" ladies "

Love

Me too 😀😀nothing wrong

Ahh I am bisexual BT my parent can't appreciate😭😭

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply
Nonjabulo

I like boys also girls

just move on with your life coz it's hard to feel the pain each and every-minute..move on i support you.

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

ummmmmm

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Hi girls...I think I'm bisexual cos I have a boyfriend n yet there's this girl at school she drives me crazy......wat should I do

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

bbes im not sure whthr im lesbian or not ....iv been dating a few guys to check out my sexuality and the relationships never lasted....i dont feel them thou i force myself to be with them coz my dad is muslim and it will course tention and conflict if he finds out

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

HEYY IM A GIRL WHO IS CONFUSED WITH HER LIFE BCZ MY RELATIONSHIPS WITH BOYS DNT LAST BCZ IM NOT PUTTING AN EFFORT AND SECREFICES LIKE HOW GIRLS SHOULD DO BUT I HAVE THESE FEELING FOR GIRLS WHICH I CAN NOT WIPE AWAY SOMETIME IT FEELS STRANGE TO ME BCZ THESE FEELINGS ARE DIFFRENT WHEN IM AROUND GUYS I FEEL SO LIKE I AM ONE OF THEM BUT I DNT SEE MYSELF DATING A GUY BCZ I VE NEVER HAD FEELINGS FOR GUY IM SCARED TO SHOW MY SELF TO THE COMMUNITY BCZ PEOPLE WILL FIND ME AS A CLUWN

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hi Springster, we should only be in relationships when we feel we are ready for them. It's true that relationships require effort and both men and women have to make certain sacrifices when they are in relationships sometimes. When it comes to your attraction for girls, the feelings that you are experiencing are totally normal so we hope that you try to not see it as a shameful thing. Some people will end up going with the flow and others never change, but you accepting yourself is the most important thing. On the other hand, coming out is a very big deal, especially if you feel like you are in an unsafe environment where people aren't accepting. If you don't feel ready to come out yet, that's also still fine. Don't put any pressure on yourself. Still, we think you should talk to people who might be able to understand you. You can speak to the people at the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline. They are available Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 and you can contact them on their National Hotline:0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 31

Well me 2 l hangout wit guys I feel like lm one of them l also have feelings 4 gals l told my mom.since she's bisexual she understood just easy like tht.l live my life and I'm only 15yrs old living the best life

Hi,my name is Meagan iam 20years old and I never got a boyfriend iam looking for some one who love me,and some one who not force me to have sex white jim

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hello Bouncylicious It is always better to do things when you are ready and not allow anyone to force. We really wish you luck Springster and feel free to ask anything you want to.We love you.

By pumpkin l think u should find someone who'll be patient & gentle on u

Alyvia

Hey Springsters , I'm new here I'm turning 17 this year and I don't know what I am it's all so confusing,what does pansexual mean by the way?

Hey...I found out that my boyfriend is gay...we've been dating for 4 years...i still love him but I cant do this anymore..what must I do???😭

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Leave him obvious

Let him be sis I know it hard

Hey I'm Rethabile I need your help guys I have a man but I don't like him cz I'm much more interested in girl actually I'm a lesbian but I'm afraid to tell my parent so help me what should i do and there is this girl I love but I'm afraid to tell her❤

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hi Rethabile, please refrain from mentioning your name in the comment section. We will use your username when we reply back to you. With regards to your question, please understand that your feelings for girls are totally normal, so don't feel embarrassed, ashamed or anything like that. coming out is a very big deal, especially if you feel like you are in an unsafe environment where people aren't accepting. If you don't feel ready to come out yet, that's also still fine. Don't put any pressure on yourself. Still, we think you should talk to people who might be able to understand you. You can speak to the people at the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline. They are available Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 and you can contact them on their National Hotline:0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 31

Ok thank you so much dear for your help I will try my best

Tell the gal u like her ,who knows she might be lnto lesbians. If u don't try you'll nvr know

I am 15 years old and I haven't started my periods yet is there something wrong with me??

March 20, 2022, 8:56 p.m.

looking fo lesbian amhorny need fingr fuckr

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Latest Reply

Keep looking sweetheart

Anytime

Love

Yes babes just call I will be there and I love a finger fucker👍

Hey guys I need your help...I have a boyfriend but I don't luv or lyk to be with him...I have realized that I am interested in gals...there was this gal I had a crush on... I told her and she felt the same but the fact is that I am afraid to tell my parents...pls help me Springsters

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hi there Springster, your feelings for other girls are totally normal, so don't feel embarrassed, ashamed or anything like that. It would also be a really good idea to be honest to your partner about you perhaps not wanting to be with him. You don't have to tell him that you are lesbian, especially if you do not feel like you want to at this point. Coming out is a very big deal, especially if you feel like you are in an unsafe environment where people aren't accepting. If you don't feel ready to come out to your family yet, this is okay and you don't have to rush yourself. Don't put yourself under too much pressure. In the meantime, we would advise you to talk to people who can offer you some support. You can speak to the people at the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline. They are available Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 and you can contact them on their National Hotline:0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 31

Hi there Springster, your feelings for other girls are totally normal, so don't feel embarrassed, ashamed or anything like that. It would also be a really good idea to be honest to your partner about you perhaps not wanting to be with him. You don't have to tell him that you are lesbian, especially if you do not feel like you want to at this point. Coming out is a very big deal, especially if you feel like you are in an unsafe environment where people aren't accepting. If you don't feel ready to come out to your family yet, this is okay and you don't have to rush yourself. Don't put yourself under too much pressure. In the meantime, we would advise you to talk to people who can offer you some support. You can speak to the people at the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline. They are available Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 and you can contact them on their National Hotline:0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 31

I totally understand the feeling of not knowing where you really stand with your sexuality. I am still ashamed too of what I am, and not knowing how to come out to my family and friends about my sexuality. I would like that one day I become brave and tell them that I have stronger feelings for the same sex and I'm tired of living a lie it's been too long now.

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey ZeeMbali, everyone's story is different and thank you for sharing yours. Coming out is great, but it's important to think about whether or not the environment you are coming out in is a safe one. Don't rush yourself too much. Come out when you are ready and if you know that it is also safe to.

You can also people who might be able to understand you better than those you are around. You can speak to the people at the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline. They are available Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 and you can contact them on their National Hotline:0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 31

It was very brave of you to open up to your parents... I too was afraid at first but then I managed to tell my mother that I am a Lesbian... I am afraid that my dad will be disappointed when he finds out since his family already arranged a marriage for me when I turn 18...

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hi Springster, thank you so much for reaching out to us and telling us a bit about your coming out story. We're so glad that you were able to come out to your mom. Please keep on growing that strong bond and make sure to go to her when you have issues. Maybe you can also ask your mom for advice about coming out to your dad and you can even ask her to be with you when you do. Also remember that coming out is a huge deal and you only want to do so when you feel safe. If you are not ready to come out to your dad yet, you can do so in the distant future or when you are truly ready. Unfortunately we can't talk to you directly, but if you feel uncomfortable with the idea of an arranged marriage, contact Childline SA. They offer counselling over the phone, in person and online. You don't need to give them your name and can contact them any time of the day or night. Contact them if you are scared, feel alone and if something is happening to you, or someone you know. They are here to help you! Don't forget you can contact them on their 24/7 Toll Free Helpline: 08 000 55 555 for help. Check out their website on http://www.childlinesa.org.za as well as their Facebook and Twitter page for useful information.

Hi guys...I'm lesbian too...20yrs old..love my life at the moment...although it was not easy telling my mom that I am les...but because she has frds who are les she could relate big...and that she knows things are easier even when we talk...we even joke about...wat she doesn't like about lesbian is that she would say we are bitchy that wat she says...my mom but it great...and wat I would like to Say is that...is we have to be proud of who we are and imbrace it in our days of living...and live the bet life we can possibly do...imbrace the lesbianism in us....the les (femme)....the les (butch/stud)...if feels good to have people who relate to u and understands u

I am not lesbian but rather I both like boys and girls I told my mom this and she didn't seem to care💔

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster, we're so glad you were able to open up to your mom like that, especially because coming out with your sexual orientation is not always an easy task. We understand why this might be upsetting to you. Coming out is a big deal and for someone to seem like they don't care can be very heartbreaking. Although you may not feel like you can speak to you mom at this point we would recommend you speak to another adult you trust for support, maybe a relative, teacher or school counselor? The Gay and Lesbian helpline can also provide advice. They are available Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 and you can contact them on their National Hotline:0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 31

Hi springsters it good to be back...and yeah 😊

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Hi springsters I don't know if u can help me but...I'm in love with this girl we were dating then things changed...when we started dated she had another gf...but yeah so now...I broke things up...but she still calls me asking me to come over...we then have sex...I really love her but I don't want to be her boodycall or something like that...and wat hurts me the most is that she'll post her gf on whatsapp...but coz we broke up I can't say anything about it...and yet we still having sex together...please help springsters I'm confused I don't know wat to do😣😭

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Latest Reply

Honestly! She has made you her spare wheel ,sex partner... And she doesn't care about how you feel ,your feelings ... So to make things simple delete her from your life or you gonna lose yourself ey

Tnx springster I'm going to do just that 😊

I'm also a lesbian!! I also denied told my self I was straight even though I had feelings for girls!! Then I found my bae my lesbian bae and my friends knew and were happy!! And we've been dating eversince

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Am also lesbian bt can't tell my family due 2 that they will not accept me especially my mom. I tried dating Boyz bt relation didn't last, then I dated this other boy we dated 4 months bt I wasn't comfortable when I had 2 kiss him. I then told him abt my self and who I truly am, he accepted me as bisexuality person bt I knew I was lesbian I felt alive dating gallery Now am dating my skool mate, she caring,loving,does everything 2 make me happy so do I Bt don't know how 2 tell my parents cause when they ask who am dating I reply and say "am happy single don't lyk dating" Plzzzzzzz help

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Iam a lesbian too I used to in denial I gave up my virginity to my ex boyfriend after that I started to avoid him..Earlier this year on June 24 I started dating this girl I felt peace I felt free that's when I accepted the fact that I'm a lesbian.... The challenge is coming out the worst part is telling my family I have many unanswered questions.. Like will they accept me?,Will they disown me? Thats my story... A 14 year old lesbian❤

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Hi Am 17 years old At first i was a tomboy and i lived with my grandparents But then i to move and live with my parents ,they didn't like the fact that am tomboy.....so had to quit that lifestyle. In grade 8 i started dating boys but i never felt comfortable Till i met this lesbian, she changed my life ...she was the best thing that ever happened to me. the feeling was real ,we had a very a very strong connection.and i started to accept the that am a lesbian But am scared to tell my parents .......am scared of judgement and rejection 😭😭

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hi Me2myself, we're so happy that you met someone that you were able to have a such a strong connection with. Your feelings for girls are totally normal and we're glad to know that you are aware of this. Coming out is a very big deal, especially if you feel like you are in an unsafe environment where people aren't accepting. If you don't feel ready to come out yet to your parents yet, this is still okay. Don't put any pressure on yourself. In the meantime, we would advise you to talk to people who can offer you some support. You can speak to the people at the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline. They are available Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 and you can contact them on their National Hotline:0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 31

I'm 13yrs old n I am a lesfemme but I'm scared 2tell mii family.. So guys plzz advise mew. How do I tell them that I have feelings for girls. 😫😫😞

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hi there Springster, your feelings for other girls are totally normal, so don't feel embarrassed, ashamed or anything like that. Coming out is a very big deal, especially if you feel like you are in an unsafe environment where people aren't accepting. If you don't feel ready to come out yet, that's also still fine. Don't put any pressure on yourself. In the meantime, we would advise you to talk to people who can offer you some support. You can speak to the people at the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline. They are available Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 and you can contact them on their National Hotline:0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 31

Hi there Springster, your feelings for other girls are totally normal, so don't feel embarrassed, ashamed or anything like that. Coming out is a very big deal, especially if you feel like you are in an unsafe environment where people aren't accepting. If you don't feel ready to come out yet, that's also still fine. Don't put any pressure on yourself. In the meantime, we would advise you to talk to people who can offer you some support. You can speak to the people at the Gay and Lesbian Network Helpline. They are available Friday to Sunday, 18:00 to 22:00 and you can contact them on their National Hotline:0 8 6 0 3 3 3 3 31

Zanokuhle

Hey girl I am bisexual but I am scared to tell anyone only my little sister know's,my mother doesn't want me to date cause I am still 12 and I don't know what to do I am in love with this boy in class and I am also in love with my best friend 🤦🏻‍♀️so I don't know what to do guys plzz help

I'm a less to say the truth but I'm afraid 2 tell my family plz advice me how I can tell them

March 20, 2022, 8:55 p.m.

Hey I am a lesbian too😔😔 lately I don't know how to tell my mom that I am a les n I am afraid....need advice plzzzz

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

U need to tell ur family day u didn't make itself like this tell dem make dem try to understand give them space if they don't accept u let go don't push dem or ull make things very difficult for dem

I'm looking for a lesbian person to love me is there anyone 😔

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hi olwethu😊

Aww 🥰

Hey there

Hey olwethu

Hey Olo are you a femme or butch?

I am a lesbian we can date but the problem is I don't know you can you tell me your Facebook name so we can chat ❤👑🍑🍑

Love

I will love you babes😘😘

Maynardville_love4eva

Mee 0670284322

Zanokuhle

Hey girl do u have Facebook

Nomthawelanga

I need someone too baby

I still don’t get why you need to “Come Out” , especially to family when “they’ve known it all along”. That’s messed up

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Hi there's this girl in my class I have a crush on .....how can I tell her ?And what if she starts hating me?

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hi Nesi Sometimes it is not easy to approach someone.Try something such as going to her and tell her about yourself. Let her know that you just want to be friends with her. You never know what might happen. We hope this helps Springster.

Eyy , I am into boys and girls but there's this girl in my class I don't know if she likes Me but she comes sit next to me and she touches me and it feels nice so I don't have a problem with it but I'm scared that the people around me are gonna notice I'm into boys and girls and they gonna judge me what should I do?

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Sorry for the delay, I had some technical issues. I have hidden your comment to protect your privacy. I am pleased you felt able to share your thoughts, it's a really brave first step. Have you thought about talking to an adult that you can trust about this? This could be anyone from your parents/grandparents, a relative like an aunt, a neighbour or teacher. Sadly, we can't talk to you directly but you can get extra advice from CHILDLINE SA. They can offer you counselling over the phone. You do not need to give your name and can call them 24/7. Their toll free helpline is : 0800 055 555 or check out https://www.childlinesa.org.za/ you will receive the support you need, by a friendly person trained to help you in a confidential way. Take care.

Wow u really had too much confidence to really come out of who u it really are💖🤔

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Hii I am also lesbian. I gave my virginity to my ex boyfriend. We recently broke up. After I told him that I'm les he wanted to tell my family. I was scared ND I managed to change his mind. I started dating a girl who makes me happy. But the problem is whenever I don't kiss her she starts flirting with other girls in front of me. Isont

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Sorry for the delay, I had some technical issues! Thank you for your question. I am pleased to tell you that you can now chat to Big Sis, a smart robot who will help you make smart choices when it comes to sex and relationships. She's ready to answer all your burning questions. Click on this link to get started: https://bit.ly/2TR8r2H

Hey.... The love I have for girls and am just scared to come out cause I feel like people are going to be way to judgemental towards me I just need a lesbian lover who will love me bc. I just don't have this thing for boys!

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster! Sorry for the delay, I had some technical issues. I am pleased you felt able to share your thoughts, it's a really brave first step. Have you thought about talking to an adult that you can trust about this? This could be anyone from your parents/grandparents, a relative like an aunt, a neighbour or teacher. Sadly, we can't talk to you directly but you can get extra advice from CHILDLINE SA. They can offer you counselling over the phone. You do not need to give your name and can call them 24/7. Their toll free helpline is : 0800 055 555 or check out https://www.childlinesa.org.za/ you will receive the support you need, by a friendly person trained to help you in a confidential way. Take care.

Love

Me to so let's date give me your number 😚😚

I babes I'm also lesbian

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

Your tenz

We relate I dated guys to fit in and I felt nothing for them I did what I did to hide it from my family but as they say time will exually tell when I started opening up when I was 17 and know I am 21 they still think that I will change my mind I moved in their 🏠 to stay somewhere were I can be my self not to pretend to be something I am not I went away cause I was sick and tired of their judgements I felt like l was safocating with the way they treat me I still don't have Justice today from them they still hate me always asking me how I'll bare grand children with another women they did not think about my feelings they always made everything about them and their reputation in the community and fogort about their daughter their first child.i just thank everybody who have been there even when things where not alright for me

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

What is sexuality and what is gender?🦋

March 20, 2022, 8:54 p.m.

Latest Reply

Hey Springster, Sorry for the delay, I had some technical issues! I am pleased you felt able to share your thoughts, it's a really brave first step. Have you thought about talking to an adult that you can trust about this? This could be anyone from your parents/grandparents, a relative like an aunt, a neighbour or teacher. Sadly, we can't talk to you directly but you can get extra advice from CHILDLINE SA. They can offer you counselling over the phone. You do not need to give your name and can call them 24/7. Their toll free helpline is : 0800 055 555 or check out https://www.childlinesa.org.za/ you will receive the support you need, by a friendly person trained to help you in a confidential way. Take care.